I will continue to post journals, now I know to make some private.

I enjoyed your writing.  It was articulate, and interesting.

Censorship is a bad thing.

You should write about what you know and what you feel, regardless of what others say and think.

You're valid.  You're apparently also a self-error-checker (... "error" being purely relative).  Don't be wracked with guilt or regret or remorse any longer than you need to allow yourself to be.  This connection has changed your life and change doesn't come without pain.  But recognize it for what it was; a connection.  Not a bad choice, a failure or defeat.  It was an experience that you had the courage to have.

... and if it came from your heart, be glad that you have that capacity.  Recognize it within yourself.

Find nobility in your choices, make peace with what you've invested.

I'm not speaking to you as someone who knows.  I'm speaking to you as someone who has allowed himself to unravel, self-destruct and who now finds himself hoping to recover - physically and mentally.   Best wishes.

self-sharing session /off 

I've posted more than one journal entry that later ended up private or deleted.
Not to worry!!

yeah, don't stop writing or posting.  There are as mentioned two buttons, one public and one private.  Catharsis is a wonderful tool for sorting out thoughts and that is one thing that nearly everyone here recognizes. 

A thought ... whenever one goes to some place new, it is not unusual to have to find yourself all over again in terms of new places.

Welcome aboard and stick around !

Yes - don't lose your writings!  I remember sharing some of my journals (on paper as it was 1980) with a family member who told me it was too much to bear and not to tell her that kind of stuff anymore!  I hadn't realized at the time how non-mainstream my life was!  But don't stop writing!  I look back at some of those old journal entries and wonder how I could have been so blind to the effects of some of my decisions. 

Some people get weird about things. I hope you simply "took your journals private" and didn't actually delete them. I have a few of those.